Random shit

Just read this article about astrologists discovering a planet which is might be habitable. Read the post here, http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-16040655

After reading it, I just had this thought that we are not originally from this planet earth. Possibly, the first generation on earth migrated from their planet as well. They came here with their knowledge and logic about their previous planet and found that they cant apply any of them here on earth and became insane or died because they cant accept the logic of this planet, earth. They remaining ones resort to their primal instincts and forgot about reason. They lived like that for awhile and that was when they start to understand the planet earth little by little, discovering fire, steam engine, so on so forth until today. Now that the human race has achieved knowledge and exploited the earth, the planet earth is dying and probably someday not suitable anymore to be lived in. Then we go in search of another planet like earth. One day we might go there and so, repeat what we have done here on earth.

This shit can be made into a movie! Steven Spielberg! It's your queue!

Start of my last two trimester

This is the first week of my 2nd trimester for my final year and I am already feeling packed. Its like opening a door to another room but that room is filled with water and the water just washes you away.

Anyway, got my final year project title already. I am supposed to make a cyclone dust separator simulation. Was really in a dilemma when I wanted to choose between this (pure simulation work) and making a trebuchet (pure mechanical). I chose simulation instead because I will be able to learn in depth on ANSYS software will I will be using. My uncle did told me the other day as well that engineering has gone in to the stage where everything is done using simulation. So, I believe I better start practicing first eventhough I rather do prototyping.

Training was a bliss. Somehow I am lucky to be accepted into such a wonderful company, OYL R&D. Very well organized and communication between all departments and sections is good. I wonder if I will go there again but definitely this is going to be my standard I will be looking for when I come out and work.

Training in O.Y.L. R&D

Lazy to type so much. Overall, I enjoyed it. People are friendly there, well most of them are. Enjoying myself learning about the stuff I dont really fancy when I was studying fluid and heat transfer. Quite ironic....hahaha. Now I know, with the right people, everything is enjoyable. Well, that is only half true because in the end, it's the attitude of the learner that counts.

The only thing is they treat me like a baby, so concerned about my safety. Small stuff like opening the casing of an indoor air-cond unit (wall-mount), manager ask me to ask technician for help. Guess what...with a little study on an already opened unit and a screw driver, I opened it myself. MUAHAHA. I am no baby, I am no fragile person that small physical stuff can break me, I am...cant find the words. Haha...

I lack self-esteem

When I am faced with something unknown, I always feel inferior. Sometimes I even get myself worried till I think of all the negative things about me and how I will be unable to pull through.

I sent letters of application to companies back in December. Only last month and this morning did 2 companies called me offering a placement. Guess what? I already got my placement 2 months ago but it is not from my own application, rather I asked my university to apply for me. I should have called. My mom nagged and nagged me about this. It is not because I am lazy that I did not call any of the companies. I felt very very inferior at that time, thinking that I am nothing, just a speck of dust. My mom would not understand. Probably she went through this before like 30 years ago, and it would be like a pebble blocking her way but it felt like a sky scrapper blocking my way. Same way with how easy SPM would be for me now than 4 years back.

Lesson I hope I learned is to have more faith in myself. I am not that bad....

Interfaith talk 19: Life after death

*Sensitive issue, please stop reading if at any time you find my review is offensive. You have been warned.*

This is what I summarized from the talk from the 4 speakers.

Religion A:

Aim: To be at god's feet (stop of rebirth)

Drive: Good Karma and rebirths

Religion B:

Aim: To live in heaven with fellow believers

Drive: After life justice and believing in ......(the impression I get is fear)

Religion C:

Aim: Get out of the "samsara" cycle (rebirth)

Drive: Achieving balance, no good karma, no bad karma

Religion D:

Aim: Go to heaven, live in pleasure

Drive: Believe in.... and that pleasure is awaiting

Question I asked: When we are reborn we carry the karma of the past but not our memories. What thinking should we have when we are faced with a suffering that is possibly due to bad karma that we dont remember accumulating?

Answer: We must understand that this sufferings are due to karma and accept it openly, whole-heartedly.

What I think: Probably the speaker is right, when you accept something openly, whole-heartedly, it hurts less than trying to reason out, "why me? what have I done?". That said, it is also not easy to accept suffering unlike accepting joy and happiness.

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Unlike the other questions by other students such as, "what is in 'your' heaven?", I think mine is more practical. By asking what your heaven has to offer, are you implying that if the other religion offers a better heaven, I will ditch my religion and join that religion.

This is a personal view, I find it offensive when someone says, I will be punished for not accepting a certain religion when I die.

English English...

Yesterday, I had my Malaysian University English Test (MUET). I was tested on my reading, writing and listening. Considering it is an official whole nation English test, I expect the invigilator to give instructions in English. However, it came to my surprise when she started giving instructions in Malay. I felt awkward, like I was back in secondary school taking some mid term paper. Throughout the 4 years in University, no matter what paper I am sitting for, the instructions were always spoken out in English. Then, an English paper with the instructions spoken in Malay. My lecturer told me that day that Malaysian was once very welcome in England because we were once that good and they can understand us. Not anymore. All I can say is, Malaysia Boleh!

Who am I bluffing...

Moody right now. A mixture of ups and downs...

Beauty and Grace: a perfect combination

These two days, I happen to be a working committee for MMU Invitational Taekwondo Tournament. Ah...Taekwondo...the memories...

Anyway, I saw a perfect combination of beauty and grace in this one girl. She is from Koryo, a Taekwondo club in KL. Never heard of this club before but from these two days, I witnessed and learned for myself that they produce champions to represent Malaysia in international games like the SEA games.

On the first day, she asked me "where is the toilet?" and I was a little stunned by her beauty that at the moment I caught a glimpse of her I quickly turn away (my natural reaction when I see a beautiful girl, I dont know why). On the first day she only had one match cause in her category (age and weight), there is only 2 participants (she herself and another girl). She lost that match but right away had a silver in her hands. I caught myself looking at her and for her a...LOT of times on this day. Lol...

On the second day, she joined the open category tournament as well (they dont look at your age, only your weight). I was totally impressed at her performance for the first match. A few kicks to the head and her opponent gives up. The same thing happened on the second and final match. A few blows to the head and her opponent gives up. Anyway throughout this day I stole some looks at her admiring her beauty as well as her graceful performance in the arena. When the day ended though, I felt sad. Dont know when will I be able to see her again...

I felt like a stalker these two days, keep looking at her...Wonder if this is normal or will I one day go mad and really become a stalker. I even thought of seeing a counselor for help...I AM A POTENTIAL STALKER!

MMU Charity Fest 2010: Charity Night 30/12/2010

The charity this time is dedicated to the Persatuan Autism Melaka Tengah.

Autism is a condition that can happen to children as early as 18 months. Children can suddenly lose their ability to communicate for example, a child that was able to call papa/mama suddenly just lose that ability.

This condition is treatable but not cureable. Meaning, children who has this condition can be helped so that they can lead a better life.

They can be extremely good in certain thing, in order words, geniuses. But, it must be discovered early in order to help it develop.

What the centres all over the world do is that, they help parents understand and be able to cope with their child (they can be a pain for those who do not know how to handle them) and also provide training and guidance for the child to develop their communication skills once again. The most important part of all, the centres are opened so that these children are acknowledge and accepted by the community.

"At a glance, they look just like a normal kid, even more pretty and handsome than most of you but the way that they behave is totally different than all of you. They are in their own world" said the leader of the Persatuan Autism Melaka Tengah.

For further info on autism, visit this page. (I dont want to give wrong info)

Engineering...busy course

Recently, I joined this even called, "Can You Talk?". The reason is to of course improve my presentation and communication skills. Of course, I would not just simply join an event like this but Siraj (my orientation committee MC) was part of the organizing committee and he is a great MC. So, I decided why not...It was interesting minus the lectures on communications. There I even got to practice being an MC in front of the other contestants of course with a given situation. I did pretty well I guess. The only thing I actually want to improve is to take notice of my audience instead of ignoring them.

Back in secondary school, one of my seniors gave me an advice to ignore the crowd, sort of like look pass through them, then you wont be afraid. Since then, it has become a habit that I dont look into my audiences' eyes and just ignored them. However, I think to be a perfect presenter, you must take notice of your audiences' facial expression in order to change your presentation style according to them, in other words, a dynamic presenter. The advice they gave me was, why must you be afraid? what is the reason to be afraid? then once you know that there is nothing to be afraid of, then you wont be afraid anymore.

After the one day training camp, I felt more confident already. Even after 3 years presenting in MMU, I still get shaky legs when I talk in front of a crowd. Then, there was a competition. First part is to choose whether to be an MC for a formal event or an informal event, or choose to broadcast (like those in supermarket telling you there is a sale) or choose to be a tv host where you have to interview someone. I chose to be an informal MC because I tried formal MC back in the training camp already. So, I wanted something different and formal MC is quite fixed the things you have to do. The most exciting part is, my exam and the competition is just an hour away. So, I did my part and went for my exam and came back to continue the second part of the competition. For the second part of the competition, we have to do a public speaking. I got this super lame title which is, "plants have feelings too"...we were given 5 minutes and I used like 2 minutes to explain the various possibilities that plants might have feelings all the time thinking, "what the hell?! plants dont have feelings". When I stopped the judges was like, "that's it???". I told them that I dont have anything else to say and it is against my belief that plants have feelings. Then they asked me to tell them why. So, I continued with plants got no soul etc.

In the end, I did not win the competition but I got to know from the judges that I got number 3 and I am the best informal MC among the rest. HUAHAHAHA. Proud like hell.

Now I get to my title. Comparing to business or whatever, I feel that Engineering students has the least time to hang around and join clubs and societies without compromising their studies. Why? I will tell you why. Long sem, Engineering students, max 6 subjects. For the six subjects 5 subjects got lab (like what I am having now). Taking an average of 2 lab sessions per subject, that makes each subject 6 hours of lab session. 6 times 5 equals an additional 30 hours per semester for engineering. To add to it, 5 subjects times 2 lab sessions each equals 10 lab sessions. 10 lab sessions equals 10 lab reports. Add with assignments for each subject, midterm for each subject, where got time left to spend on club activities or join events....after whole day in campus, come back to have some personal time, then sleep. To make it worse, the assignments dont promote socializing unless of course if you are asking for answers from your coursemates.

Old man versus young boy

Today, I did a very random thing. I went in the lift in my faculty building to go to the third floor to submit my lab report (I seldom take the lift coz I hate the confined space and also to use reduce unnecessary waste of electric). I was alone at that time and when the lift door closes, a sudden thought strike me, the lift will be going up so it actually looks like I am flying if I imagine the lift was not there. Spontaneously I posed like superman with my right clenched fist stretched fully and my left fist to the side of my waist and at the same time the lift started moving. I felt so happy that time like a small kid in his own imaginary world flying like superman and that made me smile. When the lift stopped moving however, I ditched the pose and coolly walked out of the lift.

If someone would have seen me they might think I am crazy/weird/childish/etc. If I was a kid, they might think this kid is cheerful/imaginative/cute/etc. So different an assumption can be made from the same act. As we grow up we constantly add an anchor to ourselves restricting us from doing this and that, even the small silly but harmless things that puts a smile on our face.

Note: Used to run as fast as possible with the superman pose and feel the wind blowing at my face. Felt so good. Havent been running at top speed and feeling the air on my face for a very long time. Maybe this midterm break I will do it.

Some stuff I read in the library

The other day, in between classes, I hanged out in the library and picked up a book to read. The book was something about health stuff. Then I got to a page that tells me I should not do any work or basically stress myself just before sleeping so that I will get a good night's rest. It recommended me to read a book maybe, something relaxing before going to bed.

Well, last night I read the collection of Sherlock Holmes adventures. This particular story is about how a step father killed his step daughter so that he can keep his wealth. After that, I went to bed. Guess what? I HAD A NIGHTMARE! hahaha...

It started off with me sleeping, then someone practically threw a bunch of pillows and bolsters on my head and tried to suffocate me with them. As, I was not moving, the person might have thought I was dead so went off. After awhile, I pushed away the pillows and bolsters and find myself in my parents bedroom back in Kajang. Not finding anyone else in the bedroom, I ran towards my elder brother's room to find my father and mother sleeping. I tried to wake my father up and tell him about the person trying to suffocate me and at that moment, a glow of light appeared at the door of the bedroom. Then a figure appeared, it was an old lady, very old with wrinkles all around her face holding a candle light. She saw me and went, "Ooppss...." and smiled creepily. I was stunned and that image stuck there for awhile then I woke up and the first thing I saw was the curtain with some light shining on it from the opposite apartment. The curtain resembled the old lady with the candle. I dared not move for awhile. Suddenly I had the urge to pee because the night was cold but I still kept my position without moving a muscle and when my roommate shifted in his bed that I dared to move and took a look at my handphone beside me. It was just 2 am in the morning. I quickly went to the bathroom and peed then quickly went back to bed.

That nightmare was so so freaky that I am having goosebumps just trying to remember and type this post. HOly shiet...

Random words + Chuck + Jay Chou

The dead walls I pondered upon

Chest pressing tightly against my knees

Through every limbs the shiver ran wildly

Distant light shot through the darkness

Killing the cold air with a rush of comfort

The walls were once again alive.

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Today, I am damn lazy to do any studying so instead I caught up with my "Chuck". It is now into the forth season with new enemy volkram or something like that, which has something to do with his mother, a new BUYMORE, still tackling lies about the spy thingy with his now pregnant sister, and trying to communicate more effectively with Sarah, his super spy girlfriend.

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Also, today I tried singing some of Jay Chou's songs by finding the pinyin for the songs and his songs I must admit, are not easy to sing. After about 3-4 songs, my throat kind of hurts probably because I strained it too much. But, I still continued with a flatter tone of course, had to take it easy. Then, it occured to me, what do these songs of his means? After I found the translated versions of the songs, I was impressed. The songs are very meaningful, not your typical "I miss you", "I love you", "I want you back" kind of lyrics. I was speechless at how he showed his feelings in the lyrics. WOO~~

Okay...raining now. SLEEP!

Entering the second half of my degree

Now, I am in the second semester, 3rd year of my degree. When start to count, there is one, two, three, four more semester (not including this one) till I graduate. The first thing I realised is that, I am a bit bored of studying already. Every semester, taking in new stuff, assignment, final exam, then new semester again. All this repetition is boring me and wearing me out. Probably everything will change when I go for my Industrial Training in June 2011. After that, I will either have refresh myself and will again enjoy studying, or probably suer sick of studying and want to get right to inventing or making something or maybe just maintain something, whatever an engineer does.

So this semester, after all those people left, I feel quite free. So, I decided to continue learning Japanese language and enrolled myself in a Japanese language class. Funny though when I entered the class, only four people enrolled in the class. At the end of the class, then only I realised there is another class and I was supposed to join that class because I had basics already which I picked up last semester from my foreign language subject. But nevermind, because I found myself a new mission now! due to the class that I joined. I hope everything goes well. I need to act fast! My reaction is always slow...haih

Feeling a bit sad =(

New semester. After 2 weeks of no proper sleep eventhough it was the holidays thanks to fluid dynamics, I am back in Malacca!

This semester however, it's going to be quite quiet coz basically, I am the only one of the A-03-08 that have not go to work. Everyone has gone and experience the working life. Makes me want to go to work too...They say enjoy your University life while you are still studying but I feel a bit left out here. Maybe after finding a new group of gang then I might overcome this. Seriously miss them, the noisiness and the laughters.

So, this semester I got a new roommate. My previous roommate Jackson has just joined the working community and my new roommate, his name is Jackson as well. What a coincidence eh...The main differences is that, he dont play basketball and he dont play DoTA. Maybe I can concentrate studying more now, who knows. Talking about this, this is my the 1...2...3...4...5...6th roommate in my three years of studies. It's hard tuning yourself so that you dont become a nuisance to your roommate. This is the 6th time I am going to tune myself. Hopefully, wont change again, but I have a feeling maybe I will have to again. It's just a hunch.

Starting the new semester with this song,

Zac Poor - Meet me by the stairs

Nearly broke my toes

Before last week, the last time I played basketball was more than a month ago. Yesterday, I woke up sort of late for basketball with my friends. So I rushed and forgot my shoes.

While playing, I wanted to block this guy's shot. Rarely, I found such a nice opportunity to block people, so I rushed in and smacked the ball. For his shot attempt, he jumped forward towards me. So, I jumped backwards to block his shot. The guy did not release the ball and continue to hold it in his hands which caused my whole body to sort of rotate towards being horizontal in mid-air. Then, I landed with only my left leg in the position shown below and my right leg stretched in front of me.

No other body part was in contact with the ground so that all my weight is supported only by my left leg. Fortunately, there is a moment (spinning action) still acting on my body which made my upper body lean towards the back. Feeling that my left leg is compressed to the maximum, my stomach muscle loosened and allow my body to lean to the back. Once my upper body nearly touched the floor, my right hand auto reacted by smacking the palm of my hand on the ground and my whole body came to equilibrium. It's like in the kungfu movies where the kungfu guy smackes the ground to bounce himself up again when falling just that I did not bounce up back. After that, I felt the joint in my toes aching but I still continued to play on. Adrenalin is a good thing; it makes you feel...no pain when supposingly you should be hurting like hell. Same thing happened when I sprained my right ankle last time, I continued playing with the help of adrenalin. hahaha...not until I came home did I felt the aching joints all over my left leg below the knee and on my right hand from the elbow down. "Basketball is physical sport. If there is no contact, it is not basketball." as quoted by the international referee that conducted the referee clinic.

This post ends with a laugh on my side escaping the possibility of breaking my toes. WAHAHAHAHA =)

Baby I'm back here~~

hey hey, after so long. finally i got the mood and time to update this blog. Last semester was super hectic with tons of assignments and those assignements aren't just your normal assignments. Here they are,

This is the first one. Had to organize a trip to a manufacturing company and write a report containing the manufacturing management techniques used by the company.

Next is using a drawing software called CATIA to draw anything that contains five moving parts. You know what this is? It's a toilet flush mechanism! Proud of this thing but the marks the lecturer gave me was not that high... =(

Third is this thing here. Using a CNC milling machine, we need to think of a logo, write the appropriate programming to cut that logo out and...input it into the machine and the machine will automatically cut the shape out for you. But the lecturer did not gave me high scores for this also...so sad...=(

this semester, for the finals...I think i might have screwed up one subject. I did not allocate enough time to study that subject. I shall keep my fingers crossed and see how my results will turn out x/

Finally, I am on a two weeks holiday. IT WAS 3 WEEKS FOR TRIMESTER BREAKS PREVIOUSLY, NOW THEY CUT SHORT OUR HOLIDAYS....DAMN

the theory of juggling life

I am afraid i am going to have trust issues in the future. So far, in my degree year, I never thought of any of my coursemates as my real friends. So whenever they cant complete their part of the group assignment, I just do it all. It's okay, doesn't hurt that much. Just lose trust and a bit angry after that. But this week, when finally I regard these two people as my friends among my coursemates, they disappoint me. Cant finish their part of the assignment. I have to take it all again. What to do? Leader, I distribute, they cant do. Either I do it or pass it up incomplete which of course I prefer the first option. But you see, when you regard a person as a friend and if they do this to you, push problems to you, it hurts even more. Not just angry, fucking pissed off is what I am feeling.

How can they have the heart to say things like,

"hard la, i cant do. you help me do la. i do other things"

if the assignment is easy, then it is not an assignment! and they expect me to do it. how am i any different a student from them? Fuck the world!

for this recent milling project i am working on, one of my friend said

"I dont think we can do milling by this week"

of course there is a reason why i want to do it this week. bcoz for next week, many people will be waiting for the machine and its a waste of time to go and wait for your turn or fight with people for the machine. In the end, i finished both our parts without telling him and when i asked him, how is the programming? he did only half and havent even simulated it. Then i told him i finished it already. he replied,"walao, how you do so fast o?" why dont he reply me "walao, why i so slow?"

and for a student, definitely your first priority is to finish your degree right?

this friend of mine is so obsessed with stock market now that he dont even listen when i talk to him. having to repeat and explained over and over again pissed me off even more. and the reason why he cant finish the programming is bcoz of his obsession.

okay lets say u want to learn and play stock trading. have some balance on your studies also for god's sake. For example, when you juggle 3 balls, do you only pay specific attention to one ball?

I am sure the other will fall.

I hate the biggest bullshit of all when you say you got no time then I found out from others that you can go yumcha (drink and chat with friends). Bloody bastard I tell you...I am damn pissed with this shit. Dont give me this shit. It doesnt make sense. You got no time, I got time? Fuck off!

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Thanks to all these shits, I overworked myself and I am sick now.

If this continues, I think I will end up an isolated person who cant work with anyone else cause I cant trust anybody anymore. The more you trust, the more it hurts when you are disappointed.

P/s: telling me you are sorry you can finish on time only makes me feel disgusted. Unless you tell me you are sorry you went yumcha, or obsessed with wateva shit your are obsessed with until you couldnt finsh the stuff distributed to you then I will accept.

To hell with spammers

Finally I decided to add in comment moderation; to review before a comment is published. Why? I dont know where these spammers come from but they just keep spamming here. My escape has been compromised by them. Probably because of the followers thingy and maybe I publicized my blog on facebook. I dont know how to un-follow those that followed my blog but I did get rid of my link in facebook.

Eventhough I have added the "review comment before its published", its still a pain to go and purposely review whether its a spammer or a real person commenting. Haih...Damn you spammers!

Tied by an invisible rope

I had this dream where I was sort of tied by an invisible elastic rope. The way I was tied is such that, only a portion of my body weight is supported by my legs. Then I would try to move and up to a point, my whole body weight is supported then by the rope and I would just go back to the beginning. I will get worked up and frustrated then when I woke up, I would be tired, which really sucks. A bad night sleep it was.